2000-11-20

Celebration

Confusion at the receptionist's desk this afternoon, as apparently something from the Properties Department had to be Fed Ex'd to Celebration, FL.

Mark, who was right outside my office using the printer, piped up, "Ohhhh, that's the Disney town!"

I stood in my doorway, interested. "Disney has a town?!"

"Yeah."

"Like, for people who work at Disneyworld? Or can anyone live there?" I start to imagine pastel ranch houses, topiary trimmed to the likenesses of Mickey and Pluto, policemen routinely driving through Celebration's streets while blaring "It's A Small World" through rooftop speakers. Lurid, white-bread, and perversely Orwellian. I could hang my hat there.

"Oh, anyone can live there. It's just that there's a waiting list of up to ten years or something, and you can only live in Celebration for three years."

"Wait...they put a time limit on how long you can live there? What the hell? Jesus. I mean, is it like Logan's Run or something: you reach three years and Mickey and Minnie come blow you up?!"

"Uh..."

"Jesus. That's messed up." I went into the mailroom and checked my box, drank a glass of water. I came back and Mark was still printing labels. "So let me get this straight � anybody can live in Celebration, but only for three years."

Mark looked at me wearily. "Yes."

"That's insane, Mark. I mean, I've been living in my neighborhood for over three years and I still don't know any of my neighbors' names! I mean, and I still have two boxes of shit down in my basement that never got unpacked from the last time I moved..."

I started to seriously panic about moving to Celebration, only to have to pack everything up again and move back into Realityland. Kicked out of Eden before I had a chance to hang my fig leaves in the closet!

"Look, Lees..." Mark sputtered, exasperated, "I'm just telling you what I heard, okay?!"

"Fine!"

"Fine."

The Fed Ex guy, still standing at the receptionist's desk, punched a bunch of numbers on his keypad. "Well, accordin' to this, we just gotta go ahead and send it to Orlando..."

lisamcc at 21:59:02

previous | next