2000-07-26

Sox it to me...

Here's the deal, kids: I am a Red Sox fan.

What does this mean to you, my friends, relatives and Invisible Internet Acquaintances�?

1) If you are not a Sox fan, it means that I don't want to hear about how much you hate sports fans. I hate �em just as much as you do, believe you me, which is why I try to avoid Sports Bars� or any other drinking/eating establishment populated by strapping 20-somethings named Chip. The fact that I am a Sox fan is my cross to bear.

2) If you are a Sox fan, it means that I absolutely do not want to listen to you spew stats at me, because I will flatline. I will tune your ass right out. Last week Kev tried to engage me in some statistical, meaningless, jargon-filled discussion of an upcoming game and I pulled a full-on Homer�:

"I wish he would stop talking; I don't know what he's talking about. I wish I was home on the couch with a nice, big bag of potato chips. Mmmmm: potato chips..."

I care about the more personal stuff, like what will happen to Burkhart once Trot Nixon recovers from his injury. That I care about. Deeply.

lisamcc at 16:31:03



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