2000-03-01

pre-ten-shus

Not far from where I work, conveniently located next to the Loew's Cheri Cineplex-whatever, is a carefully-designed hole-in-the-wall known as Bukowski's Tavern.

I steadfastly refuse to drink there.

This refusal in no way stems from any problem I have with the work of Charles Bukowski.

This refusal stems from the problem I have with some trendoid opening a bar and naming it "Bukowski's."

I had an argument of sorts about this at a party not too long ago. The bit players are fuzzy, but I do remember one particular, tidily-dressed, young fellow who took particular offense at my disparaging remarks about Bukowski's Tavern. I called it pretentious. He couldn't understand why I felt that way, since it was a fitting tribute to the man, being such a "dive" and all.

"It's not a dive," I snorted, "it's faux dive."

"How can you say that? It's a total dive..."

"Please. If someone is passed out on the bar, does the bartender pretend not to see him?"

"No."

"Then it's not a dive. Do you feel genuine concern for your well-being when you go in there?"

"No."

"Then it's not a dive. What do they have on tap there -- like, Tremont?"

"Tremont, yeah."

"Then it's not a dive."

(I happen to be a big fan of Tremont Ale, mind you, but dives do not serve microbrews!)

"Well, I still don't see why you think it's pretentious..."

Any bar that is purposely set up to resemble a dive, yet serves "great bar food" (a real dive serves nothing heartier than 50-cent bags of Wise Potato Chips, maybe beef jerky), is featured in all the "what-to-do-and-where-to-do-it, see-and-be-seen" weekly rags, and is named after Charles Bukowski, is pre-ten-shus. Come on.

lisamcc at 10:06:27

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