2003-08-31

Croquet names

Today was spent at the Manor of Linda and Calvin, playing croquet.

Yes. Croquet.

Actually, I did not participate in the playing of the game. I know my shortcomings, and one of them is the fact that I have a tragically short attention span. So I took it upon myself to be useful in other ways.

Understand that this is a group of people in their 30's who are very, very much in touch with their inner 10-year-olds. At the very least, I am, and based on an earlier conversation involving primates that fling their own excrement, I approached Shari and announced that her "croquet name" was Lady Poo-Monkey of Flingington-on-Crapshire.

Shari was delighted, and demanded that we come up with names for everybody else. And so it came to pass that Ad became Lord Beefington of Cockshire, Paula and Aaron became Lord & Lady Snogsworth of Felchington-on-Crapshire, the long-suffering houseboy became Lord Dingleberry of Buttnuquet, and our charming hosts became the fabulously mysterious expatriates the Baron and Baroness von Assmunchen of Gobshite-on-Crapshire.

Shari and I were hugely self-amused at our cleverness, and amazingly enough, everybody in the group used their titles accordingly ("Dingleberry, old chap, a mallet head's length, there, boy. We were in the war.").

As for me, I decided that I would have my own title, and thus named myself Marchioness of Jeroboams-on-Titflesh.

Croquet is fun. It's even better with names, though, so please take note.

lisamcc at 9:12 p.m.

previous | next