2003-08-12

The Lana Turner Scenario

So I went to see my therapist today. It was a good session, very productive, as I sat there chewing on my cuticles and talking about how genuinely indignant I get sometimes when I have to do stuff like balance my checkbook.

"It's just....you know, here we go again. Didn't I do this last month?" I whined, "Why do I have to do it again?"

"Mm-hm."

"Listen, I know how completely insane this is. I really do. I just get in these spaces where I don't want to have to do anything....EVER....I sometimes just want someone to swoop down and handle all of the mundane crap for me, so that all I have to do is be bright and fabulous and witty."

"Sure."

"Actually, you know what it is, Richard?" I perched up on the edge of my chair. "I want the Lana Turner Scenario."

Richard burst out laughing.

"For REAL, Richard! I want to be discovered at the Schwab's drugstore counter and just be handed the whole package!"

"Yes, but Lees -- look what happened to Lana Turner. You get discovered at Schwab's and become a star, sure, but then later on your 14-year-old will stab Johnny Stompanato."

"Huh."

"Follow that fantasy through to its outcome. There's nothing wrong with being an adult."

lisamcc at 8:24 p.m.

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