2003-03-13

Snarky peep

Looking for the Lecherous Broads for Clay Aiken? Click here, babies. Click hard.

So I was, in fact, able to confirm that there really is such a thing as peep-flavored lipgloss.

Do yourselves a favor, chickens. Go to the official Peep site. It's hours of sugar-spritzed, luridly-hued, all-American absurdity.

Imagine this, you're the lone, bitter, snarky little peep over there at Just Born, Inc. Lurid and livid, you are surrounded by bunnies and chickies awash in colors which can only be man-made. Your workaday life is about basket grass and peanut butter eggs. No matter that such confections have nothing to do with the resurrection of Jesus Christ, were you wont to believe in such things. Who listens to a peep?

One of the pink bunnies in Accounting keeps hovering around your cubicle. "Um, I was wondering if you're interested in the baby pool?"

"The what now?" you barely snarl in response.

"Um? You know Marlys? The yellow peep in Receivables? She's gonna have a baby? We're collecting a dollar from everyone, and then you get to guess when she'll have it and how much it'll weigh? Whoever comes the closest wins all the money!" The bunny beams at you, utterly self-satisfied with her cleverness.

Your response sends the bunny into paroxysms of indignation. "Oh....my....GOD," she huffs and stomps off. They'll point and whisper at you over there in Accounting, and somehow the check reqs you submitted last week will be mislaid, but no matter. It was worth it to tell the bitch off.

lisamcc at 2:48 p.m.

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