2001-12-05

ChrisT?

OK, so will my mystery guest from Bolt Beranek and Newman please sign in? I'm intrigued by the way you consistently get to my site via Google. Do I know you, or something?

I ask because these days I'm all bunged up about Classmates.com. I signed on awhile back, for shits and giggles, but nothing really came of it until recently.

I must state for the record that in recent months, I've had really good luck in tracking down all my friends from high school (the ones worth keeping in touch with, that is). I've found, contacted, and hung out with every last person.......except one. What follows is an actual email conversation between me and one of my aforementioned high school pals, Matt:

Lisa McColgan ([email protected]) on 11/28/2001 02:28:53 PM

To: Matthew A.

"Okay, so I signed onto to that lame-assed 'classmates.com' thing awhile back, and recently got an email from them informing me that all of these new HHS '88 people signed on as well. So, out of curiosity, I clicked on the link and lo and behold -- Chris Taylor. So I go to email him, essentially telling him what a fucking fuck he is for basically disappearing off the face of the planet, and I'm told that in order to 'get back in touch with your friend CHRIS TAYLOR,' I need to pony up $30 to become a 'Gold Member' or some such dreck.

For chrissakes.

So, here's my question: do I pony up, as it were, in order to get back in touch with someone who's likely scared of me (as many of our erstwhile classmates are, let's face the facts) and will respond in only the most terse, abbreviated way? It's a goddamn dilemma, Matt. A goddamn dilemma."

Matt A. on Wed, 28 Nov 2001 14:58:26 -0500

To: Lisa McColgan

"Yes, you do seem to be in quite a pickle. On the one hand you're on the cusp of unravelling one of our time's greatest mysteries: 'Where in the world is Chris Taylor?', akin to the Lindbergh Baby mystery, and the mystery of what happened to that last slice of pizza that I had in my fridge last week. On the other hand, 30 clams is a lot of dough! Think of all the beer, gummi bears, and or Britney Spears paraphrenalia you could purchase with such funds.

So, my advice to you my friend could take one of two approaches:

1) All those interested in the whereabouts of one Chris Taylor could pool our funds and together embark on this journey of discovery.

- or -

2) We could selfishly horde our monies, sit back, and watch as you slowly succumb to your nagging curiosity.

Since I have already allotted all of my $30 'Where in the world is Chris Taylor?' money toward more Britney merchandise, I will go with option 2.

Hope this helps."

Izzat you, Chris? Who are you, BBN employee? Don't make me spend 30 dollars!

lisamcc at 6:08 p.m.

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