2001-08-19

New pals

Foil-wrapped bottles of whoop-ass. Long, meaningful discussions about Jax. Interpretive mock-Hawaiian danse macabre. And a buttload of glitter.

The houseboy and I spent a lovely evening at the home of Binx and Diaryland Rawkstar Cubiclegirl, celebrating the latter's 30th birthday.

Insane.

I've said it before, no matter how much you read a diary and think you know all about someone, it's another thing altogether to meet the diarist in person. I was quite confident that Cubiclegirl, her sister, Gingi, and Riot718 were going to be every bit as cool as they presented themselves online. No, the problem was me. For the life of me, I cannot get the hang of cool, and true to form, I ended up being a spastic dork for most of the night, and while this certainly seemed to be entertaining for the others, I'm sure that it's only cemented my reputation here as the stunted little court jester of Diaryland.

It started when Gingi donned one of the grass skirts purchased beforehand by Binx, by way of decoration. She wore it on her head. "Damn," I crowed, "you look like Christina Aguilera!" I decided that I, too, wanted to look like the Skank Diva Supreme, but could not get the skirt to cascade dramatically down my shoulders. So I wore it as it should be worn, and ended up keeping it on all night.

"That's actually very becoming on you," noted K, also known as Mrs. Mobtown, "what with the pants and all" (I was wearing my very best pedal pushers, in a pattern that can best be described as Late Sixties Shower Curtain). I was suddenly gripped with an irrational nostalgia for that whole suburban idea of Polynesian cultchahhh, and broke into an obscenity-laced kind of burlesque hula-dance, shrieking, "Every gesture has a meaning!" as I shimmied around the porch flipping everyone the bird.

I'm such an ass. I really am.

At any rate, Binx and Cubiclegirl are magnificent hostesses, Gingi is absolutely luscious, Riot718 makes me laugh so hard I snort, I love the Mobtowns madly and sincerely, and this guy is the cat's pajamas.

The internet is a beautiful thing.

lisamcc at 3:12 p.m.

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