2001-08-06

Wok an' Woll

Sometimes I think I'd like to throw myself a telethon. My brother once threw one for a girl in his dorm who broke her glasses. Okay, so technically it's not a telethon if it's not on television, or utilizes Ma Bell to garner income. You all know what I mean.

With me, it wouldn't even have to be money. Contributions of beer, lucrative job offers with major magazines that don't suck, junk jewelry, candy, toys and beer would also be welcome. Oh, and maybe somebody to come and clean my house. That'd be okay, too. Although I would probably clean it myself first, just to make sure there wasn't anything gross lying around...pornography in the bathroom wastebasket and all.

Saturday was my sister's wedding. It was fun; I got mildly plastered and weepy in fits and starts. The best part was taking the obligatory post-ceremony pictures. My four-year-old niece Monica, one of the flower girls, burst into one of her spontaneous songs, in which she channels either Janis Joplin or Etta James, depending on what she's singing about.

At any rate, she was starting to get fidgety waiting for her turn to pose with the bride, so we started throwing song topics at her to see what she'd come up with. She got so into it that the videographer stopped what he was doing and aimed the camera at her for a good ten minutes. She ended the performance by grabbing fistfuls of her little white petticoats and shrieking: "I wanna beeeee a wok an' woll STAWWWWW!!!"

I swear to you I never put that idea into her head...

lisamcc at 6:08 p.m.

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