2008-11-09

Foot Foot: A Progress Report.

From the tiny, barely-two-pound feral ball of fluff that we found prowling around the Carlysle Engineering parking lot back in September, Foot Foot has blossomed into...well...a full-blown PSYCHOPATH.

Having grown up around them, I know that most cats are sort of stupid and insane, but Foot Foot is a whole different bucket of CRAZY.

We have no way of knowing when she's going to go from being all lovey and cute to being bitey and whacked out of her tree. She can turn on a dime. "Ohhh, I wub nooo...wuuuuub nooo---FUCK! I have to try and CHEW ON YOUR ARM HAIR and then MAKE A MAD DASH INTO THE LIVING ROOM RIGHT NOW."

We have a spray bottle, which is allegedly supposed to keep her from doing stuff like jumping onto the kitchen table and getting all up in your morning coffee (Foot Foot LOVES her some coffee). It doesn't seem to phase her much. She LIKES being wet. In fact, her favorite pastime, aside from eating, is hanging out in the Porn Shower and ridding the walls of excess condensation by hurling herself against them. She comes out soaking wet and looking vaguely triumphant.

And then she runs full-on into the wall, making this sort of "woop woop woop" noise like Curly from "The Three Stooges."

We're forgoing a Christmas tree this year. We just don't think Foot Foot could handle it. A wadded-up ATM receipt makes her lose her shit, so I can't even imagine what the introduction of a giant, smelly, ornament-laden TREE would do to her.

But, you know, it's not all craziness and "woop woop woop"-ing around here since Foot Foot padded into our house and hearts. She's very, VERY affectionate, and greets us at the door every evening. She's a total lap whore, and also likes to sit on the toilet seat and watch the houseboy shave in the morning.

But she is insane. Quite insane. I don't think I'd have it any other way.

lisamcc at 12:44 p.m.

6 comments so far
Jess
2008-11-09 23:02:24
Have you seen this: http://www.ssscat.com/english/index.html I have about 4 of them. They pretty much work, but they do run out and they're expensive. When we moved, I put a few up on our kitchen counters and it totally worked. They stay off them now. They ARE a pain in the ass, and I'm more likely to set them off than the cats... but like I said, they work for the most part.
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Mumma
2008-11-10 03:58:00
Oh, Lisa...she is so darned cute...all kittens are a bit insane. You were too little to remember, but we had one little kitten who used to sit on a shelf on a table in the upstairs hallway and "claw" anyone who passed by, usually snagging pantyhose of your Aunts Patty and Maryann. And Mittens used to leap and twist in the air and land on her feet and run in whatever direction she landed. In fact, one time she fell asleep mid=twist and fell on the floor and took a little snooze where she landed. Such is living with felines.
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kellie
2008-11-10 17:24:40
You mean I'm not suppose to let the cats on the kitchen counter? Ooops!
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Honey
2008-11-10 18:09:04
Awww.. insane kitties are adorable, especially when you don't live with them.
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vikkitikkitavi
2008-11-10 23:40:54
OMG Jess, the videos on that website are hysterical.
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Tina
2008-11-11 15:29:12
Silly will sit on the dining room chair and if any of my kids go by, will leap off the chair at them. She chases the kids all over the house and they will come, screaming in literal terror, to me, "Silly's gonna get me!" Sometimes early in the morning I will hear one of them talking to Silly and then they'll scream, "Silly, stop hurting me!"
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