2008-04-23

Fashion (turn to the left!)

It's interesting to note, in the first few days of truly decent weather, what people choose to wear. How they all let their respective freak flags fly, if you will. Because we've spent months burying our collective light under layers of wool and acrylic something-or-other.

Working within walking distance of at least 6 colleges/universities/trade schools, I see a lot of interesting choices as regards apparel. Of course, the Northeastern University kids have been out in flip-flops and pajama bottoms since March, regardless of the temperature. UGG boots, I'm sad to report, are still in favor. Closer to my home turf, Crocs are making a sorely unnecessary comeback.

The verdict is still out on girls who pair sundresses with jeans. I confess that I myself have done this, but I worry ceaselessly that I look like an idiot. I'm also not quite sure how I feel about sundresses and cowboy boots, only because I wonder -- sometimes aloud -- "Don't your feet get WICKED SWEATY?"

I'm kind of liking the cheap, chintzy repro "New Wave" look that some of the art school kids are sporting now. You know: the shirts with the geometric day-glo patterns and the big plastic earrings. It's like watching an old episode of "Square Pegs."

Finally, and I say this not because I am especially religious -- or even all that respectful of the religion in which I was raised -- this just really chafes my nonexistent nads, and I have to have it out: ROSARY BEADS ARE NOT NECKLACES. They are used by Catholics to pray and to meditate upon the Mysteries of the faith. Look, I do understand if you weren't brought up Catholic and you don't know any better, it's a string of beads with a crucifix dangling off the end, which basically equals: necklace. Except that it isn't. And I'm not one of these people who feel that one must be respectful of religious totems. I don't really know why I get bunged up about it. Maybe it's because I went to a school where you'd get the ever-lovin' tar beaten out of you if you wore your rosary beads as a necklace. But more to the point -- I just think it looks stupid.

(I once had this idea that I'd go to the trendier sections of Los Angeles dressed in a full nun's habit, wielding a ruler, and having my cousin Mike film me as I grab rosary-bead-wearing stupid bints and tell them that they are breaking the Blessed Mother's heart. I still think this is sort of funny, but then clearly I have issues.)

Also on my shit-list: trucker hats worn by anyone who isn't a trucker, fanny packs, those awful Vera Bradley quilted bags, and egregious facial hair.

Now, you DO know that this is all coming from someone who has fuckin' SKYLAB tattooed on her right arm, and as such must needs be taken with a huge bag of rock salt. I'll admit that I am tackier than a money tree at a wedding reception, honestly. But at least I KNOW I'm tacky.

I don't know...maybe that polygamist cult has the right idea.

The unadorned, high-necked frumpy dresses, I mean. Not the "I have 8 wives, 5 of whom are under the age of 14" thing.

They do have pretty awesome hair, too.

This has nothing to do with anything, really, but why can't we have THIS Amy Winehouse again?

Really. This makes me so sad.

lisamcc at 2:22 p.m.

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