2000-08-23

Blaine Fetish

I was so giddy Monday evening after writing about slumber parties, that when I got home, I parked my ass in front of the television with some chips-n-salsa and a six-pack, and popped my copy of Pretty In Pink into the VCR. Oh, I swooned. I shrieked. I recited the choicer lines ("BUH-laine?! His name is BUH-laine? That's a major appliance; that's not a NAME!") as they came along...it was utterly cathartic.

Kev wisely chose to remain in the other room during most of this, but made the mistake of coming in towards the end of the film, just as Blaine was professing his undying love for Andie and her ugly prom dress. At that point, I was five beers to the wind (which technically made me "one beer short of a six-pack") and was thus reduced to a quivering misty-eyed heap. Blaine. Oh.

Kev, bemused, looked at me, then stared hard at Andrew McCarthy in his white tux jacket before declaring: "I can't understand for the life of me why you're all worked up over someone who is so obviously going to go bald."

Philistine.

Let me say this much in my defense: I view Andrew McCarthy in much the same way as I do Harrison Ford. To wit: having a "thing" for Han Solo does not mean that you have a thing for Harrison Ford. Harrison Ford is a decent-looking gentleman, but ultimately it's Han Solo that the girls want to shtupp. Han Solo or Indiana Jones.

When I said I have an Andrew McCarthy fetish, what I really meant is that I have a BLAINE fetish: I want Blaine to notice me in the hallway, pick me up in his Mercedes, tell James Spader to go to hell...all for love of me. Andrew McCarthy-as-Blaine is the unlikely mensch in J. Crew togs -- he dresses the part because he's never thought to do otherwise, but his bland, sensitive nature tells him that his pack of faded-pastel-and-khaki-clad cohorts, the "richies," have it all wrong. Blaine is not quite sure if a 180 degree turn into the "alternative" is the right way either, but at film's end, as he's mauling Molly Ringwald in the parking lot, you know that he'll arrive at a happy medium and True Love� will prevail. Blaine is a flawed romantic lead, one who almost lets peer pressure get the better of him, and that's what makes him so sexy.

Okay?

lisamcc at 17:02:18

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