2011-01-18

Anne of a Thousand Actresses

I finally got around to watching "The Tudors" this past weekend. Or most of the first two seasons, anyway. I'd been keeping my distance from it, even as respected friends were gushing ecstatically, simply because I was bothered by the sexxxiness of it. Now I don't mean to say that I regarded it with anything like prudishness, as anyone who knows me knows I'm a total perv. No - I was bothered because I'm a Tudor history NERD, and I was just not buying into this whole hot-buff-people-as-16th-century-royalty thing.

Because now, really, most people know that by the time he was on his third wife (the unfortunate, weak-chinned Jane Seymour), Bluff King Hal was well on his way to being a corpulent and possibly syphilitic old goat. In "The Tudors," he's....well, he's Jonathan Rhys Meyers.

I understand that in order to keep viewers riveted to this incredibly tawdry (and ultimately tragic) story, it had to be tarted up. As my friend Lynette put it, there's no way she would have watched it if they'd been portrayed realistically. And it's not as if I spend all my time discussing Proust and translating Chaucer for fun. (Ask the houseboy, who caught me watching Maury Povich on a rare day off from work.) Still - I scoffed. Hot people as Tudor nobility. Pfft.

But I got sucked into over the weekend, and I have to say, it's pretty trashy and good. And I was most impressed with Natalie Dormer as Anne Boleyn:

I'll say it: Boleyn was framed. I think she gets more of a bad rap than she actually deserves. I believe she was forced into her role in life as "The Concubine," and she never stood a chance. There is so much crazy, erroneous stuff out there about her, rumors started by supporters of Mary I that are still presented as factual.

Let's face it - it must have sucked to have been Anne Boleyn. If she was mean-tempered and quick to throw fits, well, who could blame her? The guy she WANTED to marry was off-limits to her because Henry had other "plans" for his wife's lady-in-waiting. Her family, seeing titles, deeds, property, and the King's good favor in their grasp, took his side. So she became a pawn, and played the game for YEARS, getting older and more desperate and frightened as it went on. She gets what she's been told she wants, fails to deliver the goods as it were, and gets beheaded on a bunch of trumped-up charges.

Dormer created, I thought, a very layered and ultimately sympathetic Anne. She might be my favorite now. Let's look at some of the others.

Genevieve Bujold ("Anne of the Thousand Days") is thought to be the "ultimate" Anne Boleyn, the portrayal by which all others are compared. She's saucy, for certain.

In terms of which actress probably most resembled Anne, I'd say it'd have to be Merle Oberon (in the otherwise quite terrible 1933 "The Private Life of Henry VIII"):

I mean, chola eyebrows aside, she really did look like Anne, if we're to go by the paintings from the time.

My second-favorite Anne is Dorothy Tutin, from the 1970 BBC series. Rrrrrowr! Take MY head off, will you?

I know I'm supposed to like Helena Bonham Carter. She's flaky, she's a guaranteed hot mess on every red carpet from Los Angeles to Kuala Lumpur, and when you need an actress for your period drama, Helena's your girl. But I found her Anne Boleyn to be lacking. This was not a woman you'd gladly be excommunicated for.

Finally, I'll say it - I HATED Natalie Portman's Anne Boleyn. But then I HATED "The Other Boleyn Girl."

So, bodice-ripping aside, I gained an overall grudging respect for "The Tudors." I thought Dormer was outstanding. But the hot buff actor element is still silly.

lisamcc at 9:11 p.m.

2 comments so far
Bahnibby
2011-01-19 03:16:33
I have to agree with you on all counts, Lis. HOWEVER - you must remember that Hanky Poo was a hotass bitch in his youth, so the JRM casting isn't such a stretch... at least for the first season. Or the first 2 episodes. I was wondering if he'd pull a Raging Bull for the role. Hell, it's only fair. But he didn't. He just kept looking like a big, meat lollipop.
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Lynette
2011-01-20 04:44:06
Agree - I love Portman but not in THAT horror show. I didn't love Dormer as much as you did but you're starting to make me reconsider. Her little pouty look rather annoyed me. I do love JRM, though. Damn, I'd time travel back for that big meat lollipop!! I think Bahnibby would be an awesome Anne. I'll play the aging Hank.
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