2008-05-08

More fun with Craigslist...

I was supposed to have a consultation with Justin today (to chat about doing something about the tattoo on my leg that I am less-than-pleased with...he didn't do it, BTW), but something came up and he left early, and I had to reschedule for tomorrow night. Mildly bummed, I came home, ate some chocolate, and started amusing myself in the best way I know how: trolling Craigslist.

Now, those of you who know me and/or regularly visit know that I greatly enjoy Craigslist. It's a total freakshow, without the sawdust or the fried dough or the long-assed car ride to get there. I can always find something to laugh at, whether it's nasty furniture or lonely hearts. Actually, I probably get the most joy from the latter.

Just tonight, for example, we have a sincere young lad in Billerica:

my place or yours or whatever. nice guy not a creep so dont get the wrong idea

Yeah, well, I figure you can blow me or whatever and then when you're done you could make me a sandwich. Because I'm not a creep or whatever. And I eschew punctuation because that makes me look sensitive and shit. Oh -- no fatties. Hit me up, ladies!

Very Cute Male Offering Tantra Yoni Massage Tonight...Relax in a tub full of oils and aromatheraputic bath beads, followed by a full body massage.

I MIGHT consider this (what girl wouldn't want a no-strings-attached yoni massage?), but I have the sinking feeling that the tub would also be full of this dude's LONG HAIRS, and the "aromatheraputic" (sic) bath beads would only just barely cover up the smell of Nag Champa and ferret pee. Pass.

I want a woman who could join me for an intense day in a garbage dumpster. I think it would be fun and very suspenseful. For some reason I like the idea of a dunkin donuts dumpster, you could share your suggestions if you want. My thought is to start off in there cuddling and holding each other early in the day and just be patient and see what happens as the day goes on.

I bet this guy gets more pussy than a Northampton veterinarian. For real.

lisamcc at 9:19 p.m.



3 comments so far
lj lindhurst
2008-05-09 10:57:22
One of my friends just sent me this: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/540076210.html
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ska-t
2008-05-11 17:15:42
you, woman, have missed your calling. Comedy Central awaits.
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Lynette
2008-05-19 00:14:06
Honestly. What ska-t said. I think you made me pee a little. Dammit.
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