2008-02-06

teh evil 1.

My sister's twins turned four yesterday. They're not "the babies" anymore. They're these ambulatory little people now, with personalities. Hoo boy, do they have personalities.

Actually, they always did have those. Duncan has always been a big, happy, mellow guy. It's hard not to love Duncan. Kaleigh has always been evil. I mean this is in the best possible way: she's totally EVIL.

teh evil 1

I met her when she was less than a day old. She was about the size of a pack of cigarettes, and she looked at me with these big, black iris-less eyes. She spooked me to the core, and I fell totally in love with the kid. I love all of my nieces and nephews fiercely, but Kaleigh just cracks me the fuck up.

Almost immediately, she had this demented little laugh: huh huh huh huh. She'd sit in her little bouncy swing-thing and go "huh huh huh huh" to her heart's content.

Yesterday I was talking to my sister on the phone, and she asked Kaleigh if she wanted to talk to me. "Yah."

"Hey, Kales. Happy birthday."
"Huh huh huh huh."
"How old are you? Are you twelve?"
"NO."
"Ohhh, are you sixteen?"
"NOOOOOO."
"Are you TWENTY MILLION?"
"Huh huh huh huh. NO. I'm FOWAH."

She wandered off. My sister and I resumed our conversation, when I heard Kaleigh yell in the background: "I'm FOWAH AN' A HALF!"
"She's four and a half now, huh?"
"Evidently."
"What a little smartass."
"I know, right?"
"She's a liar from hell. Put her back on the phone."

I could hear her breathing.

"So Kales, why are you telling people you're four and a half?"
"Because I am fowah an' a half."
"Yeah, I don't know about that. I was there when you were born, practically, and I'm pretty sure you're just four."
"..."
"Kales?"
"Okay, I will be fowah an' a half on SUNDAY."

Kills me. Just kills me.

lisamcc at 9:03 p.m.

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